BEREAVED PARENTS OF NORTH TEXAS

(formerly The Compassionate Friends of North Texas)

BPNT Newsletter * 8 Crest CT * Hickory Creek TX 75065 * 940-321-3302

E-mail bethreyn@centurytel.net

BP/USA * PO Box 95 * Park Forest IL 60466 * Phone 630-971-3490

WELCOME......

to you who are receiving this newsletter for the first time and to our regular members. We are

a self-help organization offering nonjudgmental friendship and understanding to bereaved parents, grandparents, and siblings. BP purposes are to aid these persons in the positive resolution of their grief and to foster their physical and emotional health. Our chapter meets in a donated church facility, but no religious creed or affiliation is involved. Persons of all faiths (or no faith), creeds, and races are welcome! We have no dues, and no one is required to speak at any meeting. Listening is OK. If you need us, we’re here for you. If you do not need help yourself, please bring your compassionate understanding to those who need the support of other bereaved parents, siblings, or grandparents.

WHERE WE MEET

The Bereaved Parents of North Texas meets regularly on the third Monday of each month
at 7:15 pm in the Flynn Hall Lounge of the First United Methodist Church, 201 S. Locust Street, Denton, Texas. (For directions, please see the
map on the back page.) Baby-sitting available:
SEE BELOW:

Please Note: The January meeting will be
held on January 13, 2003 instead of our usual
third Monday. February we will be back on schedule.

BABY-SITTING AT BPNT MEETINGS?

Parents who need baby-sitting at our monthly meetings should contact Marsha San Miguel
no later than the Friday before our Monday
meetings. This way she can be available for baby-sitting. Contact Marsha at:

940-382-3075

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Submit any poems or stories that may remind you of your loved one or that helps you through a trying period to Beth Reynolds at the mailing address or e-mail address above and I will do my best to get it into the newsletter.

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NEXT MEETINGS

13 JANUARY

17 FEBRUARY

COMING UP IN JANUARY . . .

Looking Ahead...Sharing Time

Join us as we reflect on how we each “handled” the holidays. Through this sharing, we hope to gather strength and encouragement for future holidays and “trigger” events that come into our lives.

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A big thank you to everyone who attended and contributed to help make our 2002 Candle Lighting a truly meaningful event. A version of the slide show that was shown during the candle lighting is on our web site.

LOVING LISTENERS

Your telephone links you to a loving listener. Do you need to talk about your child's life and death with someone who truly understands your anguish? Those listed below have volunteered to listen and to try to help you. By allowing others to help you, you also are helping others. If no one answers at one number, please call another. Give us a call. It helps to talk!

Shirley & RD Cawyer Y 940-668-7717 Y

auto/train accident

Beth Reynolds Y 940-321-3302 Y auto accident

Dale & Shannon Johnson Y 940-591-8539

Ystillbirth

The New Year comes
When all the world is ready for
Changes.
Resolutions.
Great beginnings.

For us, to whom
That stroke of midnight means
A missing child remembered.
For us, the New Year comes
More like another darkness.

But let us not forget
That this may be the year
When love and hope and courage
Find each other somewhere
In the darkness
To lift their voices and speak:

Let There Be Light.

– –Sascha Wagner The Compassionate Friends Des Moines, IA

 

LET US REMEMBER . . .   January Birthdays

- Robert S. Dean

January 05 , 1966

Son of Sandra Butters

- Randy Meador

January 14 , 1963

Son of James & Evelyn Meador

- Maggie Darnell

January 18, 1948

Daughter of Esther Adamov

- Glen Deaton

January 28 , 1950

Son of Muriel & Fluer Deaton

January Anniversaries

 

- Willie Joe GIvens Jr

January 13, 2002

Son of Willie Joe Sr & Nancy Givens

- Matt Mattson

January 16 , 1998

Son of Jo Lynn Laney

- James JR Boydstun

January 22, 2002

Son of Mary Sims Boydstun

- Charles Paz

January 31, 1995

Son of Denis Paz

 

PLEASE NOTE: The editors regret any misspelled names, incorrect dates, or any names omitted. Please contact Beth Reynolds with any corrections or additions at bethreyn@centurytel.net; 940-321-3302; fax 940-497-4790 or 8 Crest CT Hickory Creek TX 75065.

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Our Credo

We are the parents whose children have died. We are the grandparents who have buried grandchildren. We are the siblings whose brothers and sisters no longer walk with us through life. We come together as Bereaved Parents of the USA to provide a haven where all bereaved families can meet and share our long and arduous grief journeys. We attend monthly gatherings whenever we can and for as long as we believe necessary. We share our fears, confusion, anger, guilt, frustrations, emptiness and feelings of hopelessness so that hope can be found anew. As we accept, support, comfort and encourage each other, we demonstrate to each other that survival is possible. Together we celebrate the lives of our children, share the joys and triumphs as well as the love that will never fade. Together we learn how little it matters where we live, what our color or our affluence is or what faith we uphold as we confront the tragedies of our children's deaths. Together, strengthened by the bonds we forge at our gatherings, we offer what we have learned to each other and to every more recently bereaved family. We are the Bereaved Parents of the USA.

We welcome you.

 

MUSICAL MEMORIES OF OUR CHILDREN

For many of us, music can be a door to memories of our child. It might be a song that was a favorite of theirs; a song that we associate with a time or
place with them; or one that embodies the way we feel.

Last year, on behalf of the Bereaved Parents of North Texas, Frank Ferry put together a compilation CD of songs suggested by members of the group and made it available to everyone. It turned out to be a very eclectic and special collection. He'd like to do a "Volume 2."

If you have a song (or songs) that you would like included, please bring it to the next meeting on Monday, January 13, 2003; or send it directly to Frank. There are a variety of ways you can do this:

1. on a CD, cassette or LP. It will be returned promptly if it is not a copy.

2. as an mp3 file.

3. simply by giving Frank the name and artist of the song. He may be able to find it one his own.

Frank Ferry 105 Sandburg Place Highland Village, TX 75077 fsferry@attbi.com

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CHAPTER OFFICERS

Moderator . . .Shannon Ratliff-Johnson & Virginia Gallian
Secretary . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Shirley Ottman
Membership . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Tom Richardson
Treasurer . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Bob Ottman
Newsletter Editor . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Beth Reynolds
Greeters. . . . . . . . . .Wanda Edington & Virgie Richardson
Supplies. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Louise Ferry

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In Our Hearts Forever

We can’t see you here,
We can’t talk to you here,
But we can see and talk to you
In our hearts forever.

We can’t touch you here,
We can’t kiss you here,
But we can touch and kiss you
In our hearts forever.

We will have aching hearts forever and ever,
We will have pain and grief for all tomorrows,
But we will always love you
In our hearts forever.

– – Marlene Kimmel Leff
TCF, Villanova, PA

 

 

 

TO THE NEWLY BEREAVED, we wish you patience; patience with yourselves in the painful weeks, months, and even years ahead.
TO THE BEREAVED SIBLINGS, we wish you and your parents a new understanding of each other’s needs and the beginnings of good communication.
TO THOSE OF YOU WHO ARE SINGLE PARENTS, we wish you the inner resources we know you will need to cope, often alone, with your loss.
TO THOSE OF YOU WHO ARE PLAGUED WITH GUILT, we wish you the reassurance that you did the very best you could under the circumstances and that your child knew that.
TO THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE SUFFERED MULTIPLE LOSSES, we wish you the endurance you will need to fight your way back to a meaningful life once again.
TO THOSE OF YOU WHO ARE DEEPLY DEPRESSED, we wish you the first steps out of the "Valley of the Shadow."
TO THOSE EXPERIENCING MARITAL DIFFICULTIES after the death of your child, we wish you a special willingness and ability to communicate with each other.
TO ALL FATHERS, we wish you the ability to express your grief, to move beyond society’s conditioning, to cry.
TO THOSE WITH FEW OR NO MEMORIES OF YOUR CHILD because perhaps you suffered a stillbirth, a miscarriage or infant death, we wish you the sure knowledge that your child is a person and that your grief is real.
TO THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE EXPERIENCED THE DEATH OF AN ONLY CHILD OR ALL OF YOUR CHILDREN, we offer you our eternal gratitude for serving as such an inspiration to the rest of us.
TO THOSE OF YOU UNABLE TO CRY, we wish you healing tears.
TO THOSE OF YOU WHO ARE TIRED, exhausted from grieving, we wish you the strength to face just one more hour, just one more.
TO ALL OTHERS WITH SPECIAL NEEDS, that we have not mentioned, we wish you the understanding you need and the reassurance that you are loved.

– – Joe Rousseau Lovingly lifted from Tampa Bay Chapter newsletter

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RECENT LOVE GIFTS
The BPNT Chapter has the following Donation Programs:
Monthly Newsletter
Postage
Newly Bereaved Letters
Library Book Fund
General Operations of the Chapter
Bereaved Parents of the USA
Your tax-deductible donation to BP is a good way to remember your child or to honor another family member or friend. Please mail your checks and the name or names of your memorial or honoree to Robert Ottman, Treasurer, BPNT, 415 Mimosa DR, Denton, TX 76201. Love Gifts came from:

Suzanne Levisay, in memory of Tory Ortegren

Phil & Pam Brown, in loving memory of their son, Travis Wayne Pence

Debbie & Lonnie Brooks, in memory of their grandson, Hnuter Brooks

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This Newsletter produced and distributed in loving memory of Rona Thompson by her parents, Jerry and Beth Reynolds.

– Shirley Cognard Ottman The Slender Thread

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Angels of the Snow

Snow angels live in splendor,
In a land beyond all tears,
Where time and space do not exist,
No sadness, pain, nor fear.

Held closely to the bosom
Of all Everlasting Light,
Each cherub frolics happily,
In fanciful delight.

I long to be within their midst,
Where crystal majesty,
Gives way to charming images,
Of winter fantasy.

Let me follow close behind,
When I’ve lived out my days,
The path where angels of the snow,
Live and love and play.

– – Joanetta Hendel Indianapolis, IN “Food for the Soul”

 

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A fellowship for bereaved parents You need not walk alone!